do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
