I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
