So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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