Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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