He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
