What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
