Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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