Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize