I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
you mean i was at the winter classic?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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