I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
