I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
