i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
