There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I wish there were birth control emojis
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize