everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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