haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I can't put those talents on a resume
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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