U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
