I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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