Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
