so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize