I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
