Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
