sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
