i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
