THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
