So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
