Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
