whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Two words: blizzard sex
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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