My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize