what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
