Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I got inside last night via doggy door
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
