There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
