ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
