Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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