Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
