High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
He called his prostate his "boner button".
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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