do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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