school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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