I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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