Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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