That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
