the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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