Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
