oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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