How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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