I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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