Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize