I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
