He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize