Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
