if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Randomize
