I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
