TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
